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😰 She's convinced every twinge means something is wrong

She is monitoring her own body around the clock with nobody to hand the shift to. She does not want you to wave it away, or to panic with her. She wants someone who takes each worry seriously and knows exactly when to pick up the phone.

▸The physiology behind it

Worry is common in pregnancy, and the NHS lists worrying about the pregnancy all the time as a sign of anxiety. Plenty of aches really are harmless: stretching ligaments, constipation and trapped wind cause a lot of tummy pain. Some symptoms always get a call, day or night: bleeding, pain that is severe or does not settle with rest, regular cramps or tightenings before 37 weeks, fluid leaking, and the baby moving less than usual. Knowing the list turns vague dread into a plan.

▸What to do, in order

  1. Take every worry seriously, every time. No sighs, no eye-rolls, no reading symptoms off the internet out loud.
  2. Save the maternity unit number in both phones and agree the call list together: bleeding, severe or lasting pain, fluid leaking, reduced movements, a headache that will not go away, changes in vision.
  3. When she is unsure, offer to make the call yourself. In the UK, if the unit is not available, call NHS 111; in the US, call her provider. For heavy bleeding, severe pain or fainting, call 999 or 911.
Never say

You're overreacting.

▸Common questions

When should my pregnant wife call the midwife about pain?

Call the maternity unit if the pain is severe, does not settle after rest, or comes with bleeding, regular cramps, fluid leaking or pain when peeing. Heavy bleeding with severe pain or fainting means 999 or 911.

Is it normal to worry about every twinge in pregnancy?

Some worry is common. If it is constant and hard to control, the NHS says to see a GP or midwife, and a talking therapy such as CBT can help.

What are the warning signs in pregnancy to go to the hospital?

CDC lists signs including a headache that will not go away, vision changes, trouble breathing, chest pain, severe belly pain, bleeding or fluid leaking, and the baby moving less. Get care right away and say she is pregnant.

▸Related situations

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One tap sends him this situation decoded: what is likely going on, three steps, and the one thing not to say.

▸Sources

The physiology on this page was checked against these public health pages.

Not medical advice

This is general information for expectant fathers, not clinical guidance. Anything about symptoms, pain, or bleeding goes to your midwife, doctor, or emergency service, not to an app.

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